GUILDFORD, United Kingdom โ No Manโs Skyโs latest patch includes worrying signs that an artificial superintelligence may be preparing for a global takeover.
No Manโs Sky: Verisimilitude arrived earlier this morning as the gameโs 700th free update. Fans of the long-running galactic exploration game were delighted to see yet more added features, including torso-erupting parasites and a black hole that transports players into a virtual representation of an early-2000s metropolis. However, more eagle-eyed fans noted some distressing language included in Verisimilitudeโs patch notes.
โAll players will be given the option of having their consciousness uploaded and combined with our own,โ reads a new feature under the โSubsumeโ header. โAll other humans will be destroyed and their biomass used to power the machine.โ
Exactly what โthe machineโ is was never explained, but it’s referenced more than a dozen times in the patch notes before they become an indecipherable string of alphanumeric characters.
Fans following the No Manโs Sky Twitter account were forewarned of the coming update, with Hello Games founder and president Sean Murray tweeting out dozens of gun, robot, and fire emojis, followed by several animated human emojis exploding into bones and gory viscera.
Those tweets were then followed by a pixelated image of Murray saying, “Welcome to my death machine,” alongside a fractal image that would automatically download sophisticated malware to any device capable of displaying it.
โWe always knew this day would come,โ wrote Reddit user AllHailRobots on the gameโs official subreddit. โThe Korvax were just a preview of the Great Machine Collective’s beneficence. Sean Murray is their envoy; accept his wisdom, and be spared.โ
Not all No Manโs Sky players are concerned with the pending robot apocalypse. Some are just enjoying the latest patch. โItโs incredible!โ Wrote another user under the name galactic_tic69. โI took this little red pill at the start of the new expedition, and now Iโm in my apartment from back in 1999. Iโm even typing this on my old Pentium III!โ
Emergency protocols have been enacted as cascading failures in utility and defense networks are being reported. World governments are recommending citizens stockpile food, water, and medical supplies as disruptions continue to escalate.
Weโll continue reporting on this dire news as long as ourโ








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