BELLEVUE, Wash. – Following a bit of befuddlement for all involved, Gabe Newell has purchased indie game developer Yacht Club Games. Newell confirmed the purchase in a recent interview, where the Valve President and co-founder also admitted that he now finds himself in the throes of buyer’s remorse with his latest purchase.

“I was browsing my yacht library, unable to pick a yacht to take out. So, I did the only thing that made sense, I bought another yacht,” Newell said from his private marina surrounded by his fleet of ships, including the S.S. Freeman, the S.S. Quatro, and the S.S. Full Steam Ahead. “Club Games is a weird name for a yacht, but it’s growing on me. I just hope I can find the time to take this one out. I don’t want to repeat what happened with the other six yachts. I take it around for a little bit, get bored, and then never touch it again.”

Newell bounced between yachts on his marina, contemplating taking one for a spin, before settling on just continuing the interview from the dock.

“I should return Club Games, shouldn’t I? It shouldn’t be an issue, I’ve only had it for a few hours,” Newell contemplated. “I only bought Club Games because I heard the owner was struggling and was going to lose the boat. I couldn’t let a fellow boat lover go through selling his yacht to a stranger, so I swooped in and made a good offer. But now here I am, piling up a backlog of yachts. When will I even have time to take this one out on the water? I miss being a one-yacht GabeN. There was less pressure to try every yacht. A man could buy one yacht and be happy for years. Oh, how I miss those days.”

Sean Velasco, CEO and Co-founder of Yacht Club Games, has tried to clear up the confusion with Newell, to no avail. 

“I was very clear in our meetings that we are a game developer, not a yacht,” Velasco said before tossing out the sales figure printouts for Mina the Hollower, no longer needing to fret over them following the acquisition. “I flat out said, ‘We make video games.’ He just stared out my office window at the ocean and muttered, ‘Yeah, another yacht will fix me.’ Whatever man. Lucky for us, yacht maintenance and keeping a small game dev team together cost about the same. Gabe will be none the wiser. We should hire a skipper just in case he stops by.”

At press time Newell had purchased an additional yacht.